Tuesday, July 26, 2016

92+



Kvetch, groan, but be happy.

Shrinking feet or growing feet? Either one works for me. Shoes easy to put on.

Gas or bowel movement? Bad risk to reward ratio if I choose gas route! Can get messy.

I use the stool!

First call at 1:00 AM! Second call at 2:30-3:00AM. The real moment of truth comes at around 5:00AM. Should I give up the fight and just piss in bed? Haven't chosen pissing in bed, yet.

Hydrating all day, with a weak bladder, results in a lot of pissing, but not all at once.

Being forced to use a 'walker' ain't too swift. But being bed bound or dead are poor fucking alternatives.

Wham, bam, slam!!! On my back again Mam!

A so called 'Care Giver' neglected to lock the wheels of my wheelchair which slid out from under me when I tried to sit down. I flew threw the air with the greatest of ease except that I wasn't on a fucking flying trapeze.

Roses are red, violets are blue, always walking up the down stairway when you're 92.

~

4 comments:

Dan said...

Bernie, you have a penchant for taking the worst and making it hysterical. Thanks for the great laughs!!!

mup said...

Great: although I would have said STILL walking up the down staircase. Luv ya! marian

jennifer said...

Still have your wits! love ya!

Unknown said...

Bernie, Darling,
I love your sense of humor even in difficult times! You are a true hero and I miss you and I love you.
Maria xoxoxoxoxo