Friday, December 9, 2016

Life At 93

Staying hydrated and dry simultaneously is a major challenge.
Passing gas and bowel movements, often simultaneous, sounds like a loud explosion. Always unexpected and gives new meaning to the old army expression of 'blow it out your ass'. (Thank you Jack Tunnell.)

Diagnosed with lung cancer at 93 has reduced my life expectancy from immortality to God knows how long. Shooting for 8 years of remission. Though living until I'm 104, sounds indescribable. Good or bad, suit yourself. A lot depends on the size of your bank account.

In spite of being a 'recovering alcoholic' for 43 years, I still miss being 'whiskey smart'...Don't miss feeling awful (aka feeling like shit) after an evening of sincere drinking.

Two 'walkers', both distasteful. One seems to incorporate strength training. I check for laughers, my so called biceps, after using that walker. Never any change. Instant change a pipe dream.

Getting old was fun. Breathing hard after sex was good. Breathing hard after walking 40 steps or having a bowl movement, no fun at all. Heart rate out the window. But at least I still have one.

Getting dressed and undressed a stretching workout; 25 minutes, coming and going. Haven't put my warmups on backwards lately.
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